Daytime Emmy Rant!

Yesterday I readily strapped myself in, ready to be dazzled and amazed by that one event that comes but one time a year and threatens to detonate my television with such excitement that I may have to buy a spare just to get through the second half! Filled with the hottest people on television and the more drama than the Source Awards and the G20 summit combined!

No I’m not talking about the Bachelor; I’m talking about the Daytime Emmy Awards!

I tuned in to watch my favorite soap opera rack in the awards one by one, whilst being entertained by the most genius actor/actresses and creative teams. Unfortunately this wouldn’t be the experience I would have!

Opening with David Copperfield (my first WTF moment of the night) I thought I was going to be wowed as he made some beautiful soap starlettes appear, disappear or turn into Tigers or something but, I was vastly unentertained when all he did was make Regis Philbin appear.

Philbin a competent host was interesting to watch but, even that wouldn’t save the rest of the show which would be plagued with awkward timings, strange faces, odd camera errors and a tan that could illuminate most of south east Asia.

But before I go on to the bad let me acknowledge the, very few, things I enjoyed on the show.

#1 The outfits, generally everyone looked very well, though I was only paying attention to my very lovely All My Children actors and actresses no one seemed to be hideously dressed. Special mentions: Jacob Young, Bobbie Eates , Rebecca Budig, Chrishelle Stause and Susan Lucci twice (she looked stunning in both her Black dress and White gown).

#2 Chubby Checker: is there anything else to say? It was Chubby Checker and everyone was twisting! Could they have been having more fun!?

#3 The Charity that Motel Williams broke down talking about; almost brought a tear to my eyes. It was also good to see J.R. Martinez, that guy is totally an inspiration!

#4 the Performances – The Lion King, the Blue man group and a host of others were very nice to see. It doesn’t surprise me that they would have to import talent from NYC to spice up your show (hint hint, AMC)

#5 Agnes Nixon – What can I say, she deserved it! and she got it, always good to see credit given where credit is due!

Now, the bad. some of you might not like what I have to say but, I’m sorry it needs to be said!

Marie Osmond – What is going on with her…everything? She looked like one of those strange marionette dolls, propped up onstage for the enjoyment of some crazy demon worshippers. This isn’t new either, she’s looked odd for some time now but, last night was sort of embarrassing, she stumbled through her song and just looked strange the entire time. Isn’t someone going to go to her and say: “Sweetie you need to tune it down a bit”, the botox has gotten out of control. One more facelift and her eyes will be stuck between the back of her shoulders.

Dick Clark – i like Dick Clark, despite some of his shady practices, I think he might be a stand up guy. After suffering a stroke he’s still got his sense of humor and wit. The tribute to him was fun too, minus the Marie Osmond and his break down was hard to watch. But what concerned me was how ORANGE his face was. What was going on? Is someone tanning this man to his grave? There’s no reason for him to have looked that way and I often wonder where are the people who can see and say clearly: ‘No you don’t need any more tanning spray.’  Again a great tribute but, what is going on, there’s no reason to have Dick Clark glowing like a Cheeto.

The Commercials- What was that “Safebook” commercial about? and why did it play everytime the Emmys went to commercial? It just seemed like strange propaganda.  Futhermore the show came on abruptly on during one of the commercials and everyone looked confused! There was some strange editing problems going on last night, CBS just couldn’t seem to get it together.

All My Children – How can it be one of the most popular shows on television and not have won ONE Emmy last night? And why is this chain of events so uncommon now-a-days? I’ll be the first to admit that the writing on the show has been a little shoddy as of late but, still in the past years we’ve seen the return of Julianne Barr and the exit of David Canary in one of the most endearing love stories on All My Children! That deserves some credit within itself! But, not one mention of that or the rest of the good year AMC has had! Instead I was repeatedly beat over the head with the Bold and the Beautiful winning Emmy’s! What kind of sham awards show is the academy holding out there in lala Land!? Anyone who watches AMC knows that since his return Vincent Irizarry has been acting circles around all the other soaps on television and when he acts great he pulls the great out of other actors as well. How this is being ignored is beyond me. But, you can rest assured next year I won’t be watching as intently.

As always you can find me on Facebook and Twitter at: Facebook.com/Raganork8 & Twitter.com/KeithBCovington

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